If you do an honest assessment of your family relationships and see who consistently makes you feel terrible, it might be time to evaluate these toxic people and if this toxic relationship in your life is keeping you from finding happiness. Once you let go, you will be able to pursue your own happiness and fixing the internal damage the relationships has caused.
My time came last year when people I called sisters, parents, aunt - turned their back on me solely because I brought shame to the family based off what my dad did to me as a child and what my mother condoned. I spent over 15 years trying to be a part of something, trying to fit in and feel accepted. In 2015 I dropped everything; quit my job with the city, left my condo and took my son out school mid-year - just to move to Memphis and be closer to my family. My son and I were extremely excited to be around his cousins and growing closer as a family. He enjoyed the open land and southern charm of his peers and teachers. But that wouldn't last long!
We moved in with my sister and her family until I got acclimated and found a job. In the meantime, my sister just gave birth to my second niece a few weeks after we moved in so I helped out and we had tons of girl time when the baby slept.
One morning after dropping my son off at school the sheriffs followed me to my sisters home and demanded I let them inside the home. I told him who I was and was told to immediately get in contact with my sister ASAP. After 2 failed attempts at calling my sister and her husband I then reached out to her husbands mom and informed her of the issue and to see if she could reach them. Minutes later my sister called and told me to go inside and get a gun from her husbands shoe box. I told her no and asked what was going on. She told me it was agents from Ashley Furniture there to pick up everything due to non-payment. (keep in mind I gave them $600 every month as an appreciation for allowing me to stay there while I found a job). Her husband had no knowledge of this payment and to this day I will never know what happened to this money.
That night I took a walk with my son as I usually did each night, upon returning my sister decided to lock us out and have all my belongings outside in the yard. My son sat in the driveway in tears as I rang the doorbell numerous times. After what felt like an hour, we were let inside the empty house and I proceeded upstairs. All the furniture was gone; sofas, TV’s, bedroom set, and kitchen table. My son and I lay there wondering where everything went wrong. We both lie on the floor afraid to make the slightest noise so no one would wake. We’re we the reason the furniture was taken? We’re they ashamed and taking it out on me? We’re they upset that I was the reason their bills were paid and the sheriffs were able to reach me as opposed to my sister because I had lived in? Well, it’s a little bit of all the above. I talked to my mother the following day “Mother’s Day”, and she informed me that my sister and her husband were upset that I reached out to his mother as they are a private family and felt I was being shady. He felt they wouldn’t be going through furniture repossession if I wasn’t there.
To be continued